I See the Bait. But I Choose My Peace.

The quiet strength of a woman who refuses to be pulled back into the chaos.

It's been a while since I've found my way back to this little corner of the world.

September 9th, to be exact.

And while part of me wishes I could say I've been away because life has been beautifully uneventful, the truth is quite the opposite.

I've been trying to heal.

I've been trying to focus on my children, navigate the challenges life keeps throwing our way, and continue fighting my way through the emotional exhaustion of toxic co-parenting.

And some days, that alone has taken every ounce of strength I've had.

I've needed time away from writing, not because I've stopped feeling, but because I've been feeling everything.

The worry that comes with being a mother. The heartbreak of watching your child struggle and wishing you could somehow make everything easier for them. The frustration of trying to communicate and co-parent when it feels like every step forward is met with another obstacle.

And then there's the unnecessary negativity that seems to find its way into my life, even when I'm doing everything I can to distance myself from it.

I've spent these past several weeks trying to hold everything together. Being a mother. Being a partner. Showing up for work. Building my little creative dreams. Finding moments of happiness wherever I can.

And somewhere in between all of that, trying to remember that I deserve to heal, too.

Because healing isn't always beautiful.

Sometimes it's messy. Sometimes it's crying in your car before walking into work. Sometimes it's lying awake at night wondering whether you're doing enough for the people you love.

Sometimes it's wanting to scream because you're so incredibly tired of having to be strong.

And sometimes healing means stepping away from the things you love, even writing, because you simply don't have anything left to give.

But I'm here again.

Not because everything has magically gotten better.

Not because the challenges have disappeared.

And certainly not because the negativity has stopped.

I'm here because I refuse to let the difficult chapters of my life silence the voice I've worked so hard to find.

And lately, there's something I've needed to get off my chest.

I am tired of the chaos.

I am tired of the unnecessary drama.

And I am tired of feeling like my peace is something other people are constantly trying to take away from me.

I See the Bait, But I Won't Take It

There's one last thing I need to get off my chest.

I've spent so much of my life trying to keep the peace. Avoiding confrontation, walking away from unnecessary arguments, and sometimes even staying silent when I had every reason to speak up.

And lately, that silence has been tested.

There comes a point when you start recognizing patterns. The social media posts. The little comments. The repeated appearances in your Facebook story views. The things that leave you wondering why someone who seems to have so much to say about you is still so interested in watching your life.

I notice.

I see it.

And yes, sometimes it gets under my skin.

Because I'm human. Because I have feelings. Because there are days when I am already carrying so much that one more unnecessary jab feels like the thing that could finally push me over the edge.

And sometimes I wonder if that's exactly the reaction someone is hoping for.

For me to snap.

For me to lose my composure.

For me to finally say something out of anger that can be twisted, shared, or used to paint me as the person someone else wants the world to believe I am.

But here's the thing.

I'm not taking the bait.

You can post whatever you choose. You can watch every Facebook story I share. You can form whatever opinions you want about my life, my relationship, or the woman you believe me to be.

But none of that changes who I am.

And none of it requires a response from me.

I don't need to prove my happiness to anyone. I don't need to defend the love I have in my life. And I certainly don't need to participate in a competition I never signed up for.

Because my focus is somewhere else entirely.

My children. My grandson, Ryder. And Ryan.

Those are the people who matter most to me.

My children deserve a mother who is emotionally present, who advocates for them, and who continues to show up even when life feels impossibly heavy.

My sweet Ryder deserves a Gigi who is filled with love, laughter, and the kind of joy that comes from watching a whole new generation grow.

And Ryan deserves a partner who is present in the beautiful relationship we're building, not someone constantly being pulled backward into the pain of her past.

And quite frankly, I deserve that peace, too.

I have a life to live.

I have children to love, a grandson to spoil, a man who makes me feel safe and cherished, and dreams that I'm finally giving myself permission to chase.

I have memories to make and beautiful things to create.

I don't have the time, energy, or desire to spend my days caught up in someone else's negativity.

And choosing to be the bigger person doesn't mean I don't see what's happening.

It doesn't mean I'm naive.

It doesn't mean I don't get angry or that my feelings aren't hurt.

It means I recognize what feels like an invitation to chaos, and I'm choosing not to accept it.

I can set boundaries without being cruel.

I can protect my family without participating in public arguments.

I can acknowledge that something hurts without allowing it to consume me.

And I can walk away knowing that my character isn't determined by how someone else chooses to portray me.

I genuinely hope everyone involved can find their own happiness, their own healing, and their own peace.

Because that's what I'm trying to do.

I'm not interested in fighting over the past.

I'm interested in building my future.

So I'll keep sharing my happiness. I'll keep celebrating my children and my grandson. I'll keep loving the man who has brought so much warmth and safety into my world.

I'll keep creating, growing, healing, and becoming the woman I was always meant to be.

And if someone chooses to keep watching from the sidelines, that's their decision.

But watching my life doesn't give anyone the power to control it.

I'm not going to snap just because I feel pushed.

I'm not going to become bitter just because I've been hurt.

And I'm not going to allow someone else's choices to steal the beautiful things I've worked so hard to rebuild.

I see the bait.

I recognize the patterns.

And I'm walking away.

Not defeated.

Not afraid.

Not because I have nothing to say.

But because I've finally realized that my peace is worth more than the temporary satisfaction of having the last word.

I am choosing to be the bigger person. I am choosing my family. I am choosing love. And I am choosing to move on.

The past has already taken enough from me.

It doesn't get to take my future, too.

And this phoenix?

She's not walking back into the fire just because someone else keeps striking matches.

With love,

Elizabeth 🍂